My trip to Washington, D.C. the past few days SUCKED!! Baltimore Washington International (BWI) airport SUCKS!! America West Airlines SUCKS!! The Wyndham City Center Hotel in Washington, D.C. SUCKS!! X-Ray machines in the airports SUCK!! The Hampton Inn in Las Vegas SUCKS!!

It started out fine on Thursday, November 15th, as Misti dropped me off at Reno-Tahoe International airport (ha ha, there's nothing "international" about it...). Why call it "international" if no foreign flights land here or originate here? Strange. Anyway, I flew out on Thursday morning, had a layover in Las Vegas, then flew straight to Baltimore, Maryland, and finally jumped in a Super Shuttle and headed for the hotel. So far so good. When I arrived, I checked in (it was 10 p.m. by the time I finally got there), and headed straight up to my room. There was a room service guy in there when I opened the door, which was kinda freaky, so he apologized profusely, and informed me that there was no coffee maker in the room. Whatever.

The in-room "high-speed" Internet connection didn't work (if you've ever used one before, they're really not all that high-speed at all, usually low-end DSL speeds [300-400 kbps], definitely nothing to brag about). Since I was trying to e-mail a document back to work that I had been working on during my layover at the airport, I decided to try the front desk's 'net connection (they were sorry about the in-room service not working, and thus volunteered their computer if it would be quick) before going to sleep. So, I copied the file from the laptop to a floppy, ran downstairs, and gave it a try. The floppy didn't work because of the airport's X-ray machines! Arrgh. Thus, I had no way to get the file from the laptop to their computer, so I had to give up for the night.

The next morning, I got ready, ate breakfast (room service is way too expensive), and headed downstairs for the conference. The conference ended up being a bomb, and generally, I felt, a waste of time. I did, however, finally get my file e-mailed off, as the banquet office let me have a floppy and the use of their connection for a few minutes. Woohoo! (Yes, they had a "business center", but it, too, was out of order...) After the conference, I had a wonderful bowl of lobster chowder while I waited for my shuttle back to BWI. The shuttle service took forever to get there (an hour and a half for only a 30 mile drive, because of traffic, stops, etc.), and once I arrived, I had to wait in line for about an hour just to get through the security checkpoint. The National Guard troops were standing by to shoot me if I got out of line, which, thankfully, I didn't feel the need to do.     =)

Once I finally got through the security line, I ended up standing in line for another hour to get a boarding pass for a flight that would end up being delayed, then possibly cancelled, then just delayed again, and finally leaving on a different airplane than the one it was supposed to use. (The original plane was detained because they couldn't get some new "parts" for it....) Hmmmm. While waiting in line, I saw a guy that looked exactly like Mr. Miyagi from the Karate Kid, except that he was twice as tall. I also saw a guy that looked pretty close to Ving Rhames (from Mission Impossible and Entrapment). Oh, the things you notice when you're bored. Anyway, I missed my connecting flight in Las Vegas, so I ended up spending an extra night there (the airline payed for the room, but I didn't get to the room until 3 a.m., after waiting for shuttles, in line again for a hotel voucher, dealing with ignorant airline employees that were unwilling to help, etc., and believe me: the list goes on and on...) The airline then decided to get me home by sending me from Vegas back to Phoenix at 7 a.m., and then have a 5-hour layover there until I could catch the only flight that day from Phoenix direct to Reno. Brilliant. Since I didn't relish the thought of only getting a couple of hours of sleep, I told them 'no' and had them reschedule me for a later flight that morning, so I ended up leaving Vegas around 9 a.m., and only having a 3-hour layover as I waited for the same direct flight to Reno the next day. I guess at 3 in the morning, they weren't thinking too well either... Of course, at 3 in the morning, I didn't really believe the front desk clerk at the Hampton Inn when she said that they'd give me a wake-up call at 7:00 a.m., so I ended up setting the alarm clock, and I'm really glad I did. You guessed it, no wake-up call.

So, anyway, after all was said and done, I ended up getting home, only to find out that the laptop computer I took with me didn't function for 2 days after having undergoing extensive X-ray 'therapy', my floppy disk was totally fried, and my feet really hurt after standing on them in line for what seemed like an eternal nightmare. But, hey, at least the airline let us watch two free movies on the flight back... woohoo. Actually, the movies ("Legally Blonde" starring Reese Witherspoon, and "Planet of the Apes" starring Mark Wahlburg) were pretty good, but the circumstances of the whole ordeal kind of overshadowed the silver screen's flare. I'm glad just I'm back, and I'm sure glad I don't live in the zoo they call Washington, D.C.!